Month: January 2011

14 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

If I torque my arm far enough, I can break my forearm bones.

Like bending a two-by-four held in a table vise, I can just bow my entire goddamn arm until it snaps in two!

Holy Christ, Aron, that’s it, that’s it. THAT’S FUCKING IT!

There is no hesitation. I barely realize what I’m about to do. I unclip from the anchor webbing, crouching until my buttocks are almost touching the stones on the canyon floor. I put my left hand under the boulder and push hard, harder, HARDER! to put a maximum downward force on my radius bone. As I slowly bend my arm down to the left, a POW! reverberates like a muted cap-gun shot.

The above is from an extract of Aron Ralston’s book Between a Rock and a Hard Place, the story on which 127 Hours is based. It’s such a great story, and so simple, so real. It captivates me, both the film and reading about it. I’m also reading my second book on the 1996 Everest ‘disaster’, the first by Jon Krakauer called Into Thin Air, and The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev, a Russian guide with the ill-fated Mountain Madness team. What is it about these on-edge stories that I like? The simplicity, the stripping away of the trappings of modern life and post-modern concerns to the basics of survival. The fact that they have all chosen to be there takes away the tiresome necessity for sympathy even. Man and nature.

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Cleared up a lot at work, in the two days before the weekend. A two-day work week – I can live with that. This evening, watched the Relocation guy doing a programme in Australia. I’ve always thought New Zealand would be preferable if I were to move anywhere. Australia seems a little… bland.

OK, back to Everest.

BTW, has facebook been down today? The couple of times I have tried it has frozen on loading…

13 January 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

“I desire therefore I am” would be more accurate than “I think therefore I am.”

David Bohm
…

Read an article with highlighted quotes from a Pilger-Assange interview:

And despite the pressure the website has been under, reports of trouble at WikiLeaks are greatly exaggerated, he claims.

“There is no ‘fall’. We have never published as much as we are now. WikiLeaks is now mirrored on more than 2,000 websites. I can’t keep track of the spin-off sites – those who are doing their own WikiLeaks . . . If something happens to me or to WikiLeaks, ‘insurance’ files will be released.”

The contents of these files are unknown, but, according to Assange, “They speak more of the same truth to power.” It is not just government that should be worried about the content of these files, however. “There are 504 US embassy cables on one broadcasting organisation and there are cables on Murdoch and News Corp,” he says.

The attempts by Washington to indict him should worry the mainstream press, he adds.

“I think what’s emerging in the mainstream media is the awareness that if I can be indicted, other journalists can, too,” Assange says. “Even the New York Times is worried. This used not to be the case. If a whistleblower was prosecuted, publishers and reporters were protected by the First Amendment, which journalists took for granted. That’s being lost.”

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Read an article about the late surfer Andy Irons’ hectic life:

Whatever treatment Andy received, John Irons says it helped. “Did it change his life? Yes. He was amped to get back on the tour. He was refocused and ready to go.”

Kelly Slater recalls a conversation with Irons from around 2007. “A couple of years ago, he had an awakening in his life about things,” says Slater. “We had one real deep talk. He said how excited he was to be feeling everything—to be feeling his emotions and understanding them. For him, that was a new lease on his life.”

BUT IF IRONS WAS ON an uptick in 2007, it didn’t last. His erratic behavior returned in September 2008, when he went missing during a World Tour contest in France. He surfed badly in one heat and then failed to show up for the next. He finished the year 13th overall but decided not to compete in 2009. “We encouraged Andy to take a year off,” says Billa­bong’s Naude, “because he had lost the desire to be on the tour.”

Irons told friends that he’d almost been dropped by Billabong. According to Mike Reola, a friend and co-founder of the clothing company Lost, Irons said that “everyone at Billabong wanted me gone when I was off tour” and that “Paul Naude was the only one who fought for me.” Irons also told friends that he took a substantial pay cut.

His wife has blocked the release of the toxicology report for six months.

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Back to work after a week in the Lake District. Wading through a thick inbox this morning, and this afternoon finishing off the last of the K/Bohm dialogues from 1975. This final conversation is about desire being the root of the self, and how we desire to be free of desire once we see the relentless problems it causes.

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The introduction of the shoulder stand on day 13 of the 28-day yoga course. Put a shoulder stand in a yoga sequence and it will change everything. A very subtle yet powerful effect. I look forward to practising more. I’m coming back to full health now.

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C found a place to live in Alresford, looks like. It’s sharing, but with someone who is working in London weekdays. We enjoyed a snooping session on Google Maps, looking for the house numbers on dustbins, ahead of a real visit on Saturday.

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The WordPress postaday2011 topic for today is: What are you looking forward to this year?

– a bit of surfing
– a lot of yoga
– some long walks
– space
– skiing?
– reorganising the flat
– a new bathroom
– healthy health
– My brother’s wedding

12 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

Took the day off and spent the morning in bed, after an hour’s yoga session. I felt quite run down, and again itchy feeling in my face and weak eyesight. There is no doubt this is the effect of a week of wheat and a little sugar. In the afternoon we did a food shop, with C driving both ways, through the dark and rain. She did well and it’s looking good for the test in a week’s time. This evening after home made pizza we watched 127 Hours, the second time for me. It’s such a watchable film, despite knowing the plot, and is one of my all time favourites. I don’t want to get trapped in a canyon, but wouldn’t it do us all good to be forced to stop for five days and face what we are?

11 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

Woo: 11.1.11 – according, only, to those Gregorian dudes, so don’t read too much into it.

A day of packing and travel. The drive took a long time. A lorry had hit the M40 central reservation and off the carriageway into a ditch. After an hour’s crawl we saw it getting craned out, soil and hedge in its caved in radiator. Later on the A34 a van had skidded to face the other direction. The driver and passenger were still sitting in the car looking embarrassed, a police car having closed one lane.

Still got the morning yoga session in, and a half hour sit together by the fire, and leisurely breakfast before realising we are leaving in half an hour. A rushed packing session only to find we weren’t ready to leave until nearly 1030. What did I say about groups leaving on time? Jennifer took some group photos which I’m looking forward to seeing.

Good to be home, hanging out with C again. What a lovely being she is!

My tongue has swollen up during this week. I think it might be a reaction to the wheat bread I’ve been eating – what else I couldn’t guess. It’s painful because I’ve bitten the edge of it a few times. And I can’t quite talk right. I sound like the bloke on QI. C is treating me for it now; I have two needles inside of my shins as I type. Within a few seconds I can feel the tongue is less big and fits between my lower teeth again.

This photo looking east from Yewfield while waiting to leave:

It was a damn fine week.

10 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

For the first time on this staff week I went to sleep on time and woke up ahead of the alarm. Ahead by 20 minutes not 4 hours. Day 10 of the yoga course, adding the locust pose. I thoroughly recommend the Hittleman 28 Day Exercise Plan. It’s dated, but it’s clear, precise, and builds day by day. The emphasis is on the ‘housewife’ but what he says applies to us all, but it’s not preachy or idealistic.

Today is the last day of the retreat, and our group has no chores to do. Looking out at the still dark morning, I see we’ve had a few cm of snow at Hawkshead Hill overnight. After breakfast:

After lunch and before supper I watched 127 Hours. You all know by now that he has to cut his forearm off. But that’s at the end of over five days of very little food or water, with cold temperatures each night. You know it’s coming but when the cutting comes it’s bloody and gnarly. All those nerves and tendons and stuff that enables me to type right now. How to keep yourself cutting? Premonitions of a son yet to be born to a wife he doesn’t know. When he finally got out I cried and cried at the sheer relief of his return to human contact. The guy is a bit of an adrenaline berk, and the soul searching isn’t particularly deep but it’s enough to add some depth and humanity to his somewhat self-imposed predicament. And it being a Danny Boyle film there are excellent cuts into fantasy and hallucination. Don’t be screamish, watch it.

Today was the ‘deepest’ day of the retreat, with a video this morning of an intelligent inquiry into nothingness, and the dialogue this afternoon continued with a similar depth. This evening after a supper we each spoke, if we wanted about how the week was for us. It’s nearly always hard for me to speak to a group, and today feeling shoddy after the sugar in the meal, and the crying at the film I didn’t think I’d be able to say anything. But I did. It’s been a really valuable week on many levels. Some questions I’m left with right now:

What is the generator of thought?
Will thought, and identification with a continuous self, do absolutely anything to survive?
What does it mean for thought to be at the end of its tether?
Do we only know ‘near the end’ and so look forward to ‘the end’ as frightening?
How secure is our security?

Humans: Crap at walking straight

Posted on by Duncan Toms

A nice animation highlighting the fact that without visual reference we cannot go in a straight line. It’s funny to see the routes people took in the experiments, even when driving.

Incidentally, even with visual reference, our walking in a straight line waves left and right. It’s not proof but here’s a picture I took of a Cornish beach which shows this:

I remember reading in (the late) Lyall Watson’s Gifts of Unknown Things how on the Indonesian island he visits, this means the footpaths have a natural rhythm to them as they sway through the landscape. Maybe like an English country lane, and not at all like a Roman road.

Wish Tree

Posted on by Duncan Toms

Near Colwith Force was a fallen tree with coins driven into it. At first I thought the coins were fungus, but each is a coin pressed most of the way into the wood. I don’t know if individuals have placed each coin, or whether it is more of a work of art by one person, but it seems like it is the former.

9 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

Each year during the staff week we have a day for hiking then go out for a meal in the evening. After some thought, Gary decided it was too dangerous to take us up the the snow and ice, as we don’t have the safety equipment and experience. Instead we walked on the lower fells and valleys, from 0930 until 1600, with occasional breaks and a lunch sheltering from the wind on the low fells. The sun came out:

I’m not exactly sure of the route we took, for once happy to be guided and not be consulting the map to choose directions. We started directly from Yewfield because of black ice, James and I enjoyed slides on the driveway while people got ready. Do groups ever manage to leave on time? I don’t think I have ever experienced it. This time people coming down at the leaving time then fussing over laces and gaiters. From Tarn Hows we headed to Holme Fell (I think it was):

Fine views to Weatherlam and The Langdales and east towards Hellvelyn where someone died this week:

We passed by these camouflaged hairy friends:

And Colwith Force:

Then back over High Arnside and to Yewfield before dusk:

Here are all the hikers, near the start of the walk. About two thirds of the staff who came to Yewfield hiked:

This evening we went to Zeffirellis in Ambleside – for me mushrooms then vegetarian rissoles. Why do restaurants feel the need to put sugar in almost everything? The bread with the mushrooms was too sweet and so was the tomato sauce with the rissoles. Sugar is good for no one. But the company was good, sitting with Christine, Adrian, Mark, Mo and Fran.

The Kids Are All Right?

Posted on by Duncan Toms

One quarter of US teens and children take prescription drugs regularly:

  These days, the medicine cabinet is truly a family affair. More than a quarter of U.S. kids and teens are taking a medication on a chronic basis, according to Medco Health Solutions Inc., the biggest U.S. pharmacy-benefit manager with around 65 million members. Nearly 7% are on two or more such drugs, based on the company’s database figures for 2009.

Doctors and parents warn that prescribing medications to children can be problematic. There is limited research available about many drugs’ effects in kids. And health-care providers and families need to be vigilant to assess the medicines’ impact, both intended and not. Although the effects of some medications, like cholesterol-lowering statins, have been extensively researched in adults, the consequences of using such drugs for the bulk of a patient’s lifespan are little understood.

via Prescription Drug Use in Children and Teens – WSJ.com.

8 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

Review day on the yoga course, so 14 different postures with variations to work through. Somewhat rushed as the alarm woke me from deep dreams and I couldn’t quite get up. Another night of great energy and not very much sleepiness until late.

Quiet meeting for half an hour, watching the dawn from the window, and the fire. DVD about listening and relationship to the students and is there any if we have images/can’t listen.

Another great walk, from Tarn Hows down to Coniston Water, climbing back up the valley.

Some very icy conditions, making me slightly concerned about the high level walk tomorrow. Not for myself but for those less steady and without good boots.

Tired all day, and I was much more relaxed during a fairly quiet dialogue this afternoon

7 Jan 2011

Posted on by Duncan Toms

My point in the dialogue this afternoon is this: do we need to spend quite so much time on teaching curriculum subjects? A lot of effort goes into teaching a multitude of subjects and yet we state academics are not really the main focus of the school, but rather to bring about a different human being, one free from fear, who is able to question. So, couldn’t and shouldn’t some of the time that is given to studying the world in all the subjects be handed over to the radical inquiry of the human condition?

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Instead of a hike quite a few of us went into Ambleside for the hiking gear sales. It’s a small town but there must be at least twenty outdoor equipment shops, most with sales on. I got a merino wool base layer top to replace the synthetic one I was given a few years ago. It’s made by Red Ram. ‘Base Layer’ = posh name for thermal underwear. I wanted to get some Teko socks – organic merino wool, recycled plastics, made in a wind-powered factory – but they didn’t have any of my size. On the way to Ambleside the minibus slid on the icy road and we skidded into the verge. Luckily we were able to push it back to road.

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It’s warmer in the house now, and very cosy sitting by the open fire.