So, yeah, you’ll hit some walls, probably firewalls; you are going to get burned. That’s pretty tough and it’s the only way in this yoga thing. Or the only way I know. I am suspecting that the hard part, the burning, is my own resistance to what wants to be released. The holding on. When I stay with it and breath, or just take it easy and allow, the feeling fades in awareness. Or rather, the feeling is still there but my reaction to it entirely changes.

I rested the whole day yesterday, sleeping most of the morning, on and off, otherwise breathing, relaxing, then watching recorded TV and two movies in bed. Somewhere during Jules et Jim, evening time, the shift came and there was light once more, something like hope, a thrill in my heart for life. This morning I took the asana very gently, feeling a little weak and slightly dizzy at times. Why go through any of this? Because the alternative, staying safe, comfortable, keeping any real feelings at a distance, is a horror, is not living, is a life-half lived. I know this. I am interested in a whole life. That seems to involve some inner ‘work’. Which may not require any work at all – the hardest and the easiest thing.

Hittleman:

We derive the most benefit from our sleep when it is deep and restful. One hour of deep sleep is worth many hours of fitful tossing and turning. The bed should be as firm as the body will tolerate; the head raised only slightly to permit good circulation. The stomach should be empty, which means no eating for two hours before retiring; this includes hot milk, cocoa, tea. You cannot sleep restfully if the digestive system has to work.

Krishnamurti:

Without self-knowledge, experience breeds illusion; with self-knowledge, experience, which is the response to challenge, does not leave a cumulative residue as memory. Self-knowledge is the discovery from moment to moment of the ways of the self, its intentions and pursuit, its thoughts and appetites. There can never be “your experience” and “my experience”; the very term “my experience” indicates ignorance and the acceptance of illusion.