Primrose (59/365)


Fear III

When you come directly into contact with fear, there is a response of the nerves and all the rest of it. Then, when the mind is no longer escaping through words or through activity of any kind, there is no division between the observer and the thing observed as fear. It is only the mind that is escaping that separates itself from fear. But when there is a direct contract with fear, there is no observer, there is no entity that says, “I am afraid.” So, the moment you are directly in contact with life, with anything, there is no division – it is this division that breeds competition, ambition, fear. So what is important is not how to be free of fear. If you seek a way, a method, a system to be rid of fear, you will be everlastingly caught in fear. But if you understand fear – which can only take place when you come directly in contact with it, as you are in contact with hunger, as you are directly in contact when you are threatened with losing your job – then you do something; only then will you find that all fear ceases. We mean all fear, not fear of this kind or of that kind.

– Krishnamurti

He was in a small room

I found him in a dingy room, dirty water running along the back in a gutter or open sewer. He had been there a long time and was weak, stifled, but safe. The door was heavy, of iron or steel so he had felt trapped, perhaps held prisoner. Now that I had opened the door and said to him he was free to leave, he was reluctant, despite behind held so long, saying he kind of liked it there, it was safe, known. The door had, in fact, been unlocked all along but he hadn’t tried it. As time seemed short, I told him I was leaving the door open to at least let some air in, and left the option for him to close it, lock it, or to leave it open – his choice. I said that he could leave whenever he felt like it, whenever he was ready, do as he wished. That was the end of our meeting. I felt he had left it open and a change was to come. He was a younger me.

Weekend Walk 13 – Buriton to Elsted (South Downs Way)

The fifth stage of my South Downs Way hike, starting from Buriton in Hampshire, finishing in Elsted, West Sussex. Past the Vandalian Tower, Harting Down, and the second Beacon Hill of the Way, then to Treyford and Elsted in the Rother Valley.

I always feel West Sussex is an ‘odd’ county. I like it but it’s spooky and slightly weird. This tower didn’t help.


How do you deal with fear? Turn on the radio, read a book, go to a temple, cling to some form of dogma, belief?Fear is the destructive energy in man. It withers the mind, it distorts thought, it leads to all kinds of extraordinarily clever and subtle theories, absurd superstitions, dogmas and beliefs. If you see that fear is destructive, then how do you proceed to wipe the mind clean?

– Krishnamurti

A swifter awareness

The peculiar tendencies that arise with advancing age must be understood and corrected while we are still capable of detached and tolerant self-observation and study; our fears must be observed and understood now. Our energies must be directed, not merely to the understanding of the outward pressures and demands for which we are responsible, but to the comprehension of ourselves, of our loneliness, our fears, demands, and frailties. There is no such thing as living alone, for all living is relationship; but to live without direct relationship demands high intelligence, a swifter and greater awareness for self-discovery. A lone existence, without this keen and flowing awareness, strengthens the already dominant tendencies, thus causing unbalance, distortion. It is now that one has to become aware of the set and peculiar habits of thought-feeling which come with age, and by understanding them make away with them. Inward riches alone bring peace and joy.

– Krishnamurti, Book of Life, 21 March

Spring Equinox (49/365)

Today marks the first day of spring, the last day of winter; half way between the shortest day and the longest; the longest night and the shortest. I welcome the spring!

Also, this is the last daily photo with this camera, the Samsung NV11, which has served me well for three years. Tomorrow my new Lumix TZ10 arrives…

Clearing up our own patch

In a world of vast organizations, vast mobilizations of people, mass movements, we are afraid to act on a small scale; we are afraid to be little people clearing up our own patch. We say to ourselves, “What can I personally do? I must join a mass movement in order to reform.” On the contrary, real revolution takes place not through mass movements but through the inward revaluation of relationship – that alone is real reformation, a radical, continuous revolution. … Surely, we must begin to tackle the problem on a small scale, and the small scale is the me and the you. When I understand myself, I understand you, and out of that understanding comes love. Love is the missing factor; there is a lack of affection, of warmth in relationship. And because we lack that love, that tenderness, that generosity, that mercy in relationship, we escape into mass action which produces further confusion, further misery. We fill our hearts with blueprints for world reform and do not look to that one resolving factor, which is love.

– Krishnamurti