Recently in Yoga Category

My latest home class has been courtesy of the Element Beginners Yoga DVD, led by Elena Brower. I normally resist these 'keep moving at all times' dynamic style classes because I've found it hard to keep connected to the breath and body while switching from pose to pose to pose. This one is different. Yes, it raises energy but in a careful manner, and enough small pauses and quietening poses to balance it out.

The instructor is like some kind of Italian goddess, looking tall, strong, elegant. I love the way she reminds me to smile often throughout the 50 minutes routine. I'm not sure of the style of yoga, what it's called or the lineage, nor do I care, as long as it feels good. I've been really loving the 'return to the land of the living' this practice brings.

A lingering sickness, one week now, a nausea close-by, muscles heavy and weak, digestion bubbling, farting, too loose. Spaced mind, sometimes not knowing quite where I am. Taking it easy, gently, but still stretching. I cannot stay this side of the sickness. More open to talking of my past, more open to how I'm feeling. 

This morning I followed a video from Yoga Zone. If the New Zealand video was gay yoga this is definitely hot LA woman yoga. It's led by a German-sounding guy with two leotarded yoga instructors demonstrating. It's called Stress Relief and Conditioning. Relief. Evaporation. Release. Opening. Unwinding. It's a little exertive at some points but generally these words are what it's about. Since yesterday I have also been sitting still for 10-15 mins twice a day. At the end of yoga and after work in the evening sun. Breathing is key to stress relief. It becomes very apparent when breathing fully is forced. To investigate a natural breath as I stretch. Awareness of breathing, awareness of stress and tension, leads to new possibility. Awareness is not tense. Watching is tense. A little snoring during lie down.

I'm always heavier the morning after a swim (or surf) session, muscles a bit worn and stiff. This makes me reluctant to stretch although it is actually what I need, to elongate and stretch out the physical work of yesterday.

Grumpy on waking I didn't want to do anything, including go back to sleep, rebelling against my life and its contents. Fed up with the whole thing. This fed up combined with natural awareness leads to understanding that all the things outwardly and inwardly will not satisfy. I can plot and plan and design a life that should lead to contentment and happiness, think about 'good things' but it is all clunky old thinking, clutching at straws and going back round the loop.

It's another warm day. The pool at the school is being filled after Francisco and Julia painted it yesterday. I am going to check the outdoor pool in Petersfield; maybe go over the weekend.

Peace

One month later and it's summer. The snow a freak dream of late spring. The sun wakes me in the mornings, pheasants and ducks in the garden, a sqwark and that half-quacky thing ducks do. Bright days, shorts and t-shirts.

The latest yoga video is from yoga.org.nz and I've been following it for five days straight. Not following, exactly, but working with it. I called it 'gay yoga' at first - two buff guys in shorts sitting together showing the poses. Gay or not, it's a very good routine, strengthening and opening. My arms look like I've just been on a surf trip and the tensions in my neck are dropping away, everything changing. The narrators sound like the yogic Flight of the Conchords, that deadpan monotone understated New Zealand speak. I like it; there's nothing to get annoyed about like most yoga videos.

Before the squence there is a cool section explaining yoga practice by dropping blue ink drops into a bowl of water. There is no noticeable effect at first, even after a week, After a month the bowl is light blue and after a year a deep blue. I am not sure what deep blue equates to... enthused by prana perhaps.

Lots of energy for insights and revelations these life-affirming days.

I am playing with a few different videos I downloaded. Today, a half hour session from SpiritWithin studios, from 2001. Like most of these recordings, it seems kind of rushed. I am just getting into feeling the pose when she moves on to the next. Maybe if you follow it a few times you get into the same flow as the teacher. This highlights the obvious need to go at one's own pace. Except, sometimes it is good to go with another's pace, to see what that's like, to break with your daydreamy habits. I am going to try all the videos I've downloaded, just to explore. The best so far is the Basic Yoga for Dummies. A really gentle pace (apart from the end relaxation) and simple instructions. Yesterday, I came across Dru Yoga. I have ordered their DVD, with sequences for morning, noon and evening. Yoga isn't to be ghettoised into a slot in the morning then forgotten about.

Whatever might be happening, I am carrying on with the 'practice'. I am not sure what practice means, but it's not just a fair weather thing, sitting still, relaxing, yoga stretches. Today very stiff and tight after yesterday's hour and a half surfing then later a kilometer swim. I wanted to wallow in tiredness and lie in but so glad to gently stretch and then spend some time relaxing. I want to keep moving though, because of what's happening in my life - breaking up is hard to do. It's not breaking up - there's nothing to break. So, to continue. We don't know where.